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Life is Sweet to Be an Alpha Phi

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So you’ve decided to join a sorority.

Or, alternatively, you hate any and all aspects of Greek Life and wouldn’t rush even if a naked Ryan Lochte paraded around campus in Greek letters. You would rather be Britney Spears circa 2007 than be a stereotypical sorority girl.

My recent outstanding achievements include making this banner instead of studying for finals

You know the type. They’re catty, beautiful, and you’ve heard that their hair is insured for $10,000. They’re the girls who made fun of you in middle school, were too cool to talk to you in high school, and who breezed through sorority recruitment in college. And if/when you go through Rush Week, they’ll clap and scream and pretend to be your best friends while secretly judging you harder than we all judged Kim Kardashian’s wedding.

Well, I’m not like that – and chances are, you aren’t either. That’s why I’m in Alpha Phi. But before I can talk about why I chose to join Alpha Phi, I have to talk about something else first.

I’ve been trying to figure out how and if I should talk about this on my blog. I’d be lying if I said that I’ve had a fun semester. It’s been rough – not just in terms of academics and extra curriculars, but in a way that has forced me to question on a more serious level if I have what it takes to be here. I’ve felt out-of-sorts, disconnected, simultaneously unfulfilled and overwhelmed. At the beginning of the semester, I thought that maybe I was just a little unprepared for sophomore year, that if I kept on chugging along everything would resolve itself eventually. And now, in the home stretch before winter break, I’m starting to think that maybe this is just what college is.

What my previous blogs gloss over – and what most blogs fail to acknowledge on Hopkins-Interactive – is that college is sometimes hard, both academically and personally. What we tend to forget at times is that college is not only an experience but an adjustment, as well, and that your adjustment may not be as seamless as you’d like.

Sista sistas

Maybe you’ve never experienced this, and maybe you never will. Maybe you know exactly what I’m talking about. Maybe you’re afraid that the small hollowness that emerges suddenly in peculiar instances – when you’re studying in the library at 3 a.m., or when you’re in the middle of a crowded bar on a Saturday night – will follow you forever. I’m not trying to be overly pessimistic. I guess what I’m trying to say is that your time at Hopkins will be some of the craziest and most heartwarming times you’ve ever had, but they will also be some of your hardest and loneliest. And when the laughter stops, you want to make sure that the people you’ve surrounded yourself with are still going to be there.

I spent all of last weekend at the Alpha Phi Regional Leadership Conference in Long Island as a part of our newly-elected Executive Board. There were chapters from colleges across the Mid-Atlantic and Northeast regions, and we attended leadership training sessions, brainstormed with officers from other chapters, and networked with alumnae.

One of the most important things I learned last weekend is that girls decide to join a sorority because they want to feel like they belong somewhere. They want to feel like they matter in the overwhelming deluge of deadlines and people and parties. The appeal of a sorority hinges on what it can offer both current and potential members.

You’ll often hear that Greek Life in general dominates a school’s social scene and more or less sets a standard of exclusivity. You’re either in or you’re out. At Hopkins, Greek Life does run the school – but not in the ways that you might think. You’ll find that the people who are leaders of the biggest and most popular student organizations, who graduate at the top of their class, who are the most involved and the most successful, are also the same people who are in Greek Life.

Twinz at conference

I miss my pham bam :(

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When I went through Formal Recruitment in the spring, I had no idea what to expect. But by the end of the week at Preference Round (the last official round before Bid Night), I had narrowed my choices down to Alpha Phi and another sorority. To be honest, Alpha Phi was the only place where I felt like the sisters genuinely cared whether I was there or not. To me, the fact that a group of unpretending and down-to-earth girls went out of their way to make me feel welcome spoke volumes about what I could expect if I were an Alpha Phi.

These intelligent, gorgeous, fun-loving girls could have acted like I should be grateful just to have been invited back. They had no reason to talk to me, let alone make any sort of special effort to make me feel at ease. But they did. And what’s more, they didn’t take themselves too seriously, and they weren’t afraid to laugh at themselves.

Being in a place like this can either humble you or inflate your sense of entitlement. Ultimately, the decision is up to you. What you choose to involve yourself in carries more weight than you might realize at the time of choosing. Even now, I am still realizing how being in Alpha Phi – being an Alpha Phi – grounds my sense of belonging.

Aphi love <3

Being an Alpha Phi doesn’t mean that you automatically have 150 new best friends. Let’s be real, the idea of actually being best friends with over 150 girls is absolutely ridiculous. What it does mean, however, is that you will always have a study buddy, a lunch date, a massive support system to cheer you on at your best, and a shoulder to cry on at your worst. It means that the same girls who were so intimidating and cool during Rush will send you flowers on Valentine’s Day, bring you homemade cookies to the depths of C-level where both your cell phone reception and soul have gone to die, and take notes for you in class when you’re sick.

For a skeptical outsider, this might not seem like much at all. But for someone who is muddling through an especially trying semester, for someone caught in between the highs and lows of college life, this feeling of mattering is invaluable.

And for that, I’m proud to be an Alpha Phi. I’m proud to be associated with some of the most amazing and talented girls I’ve ever met. And when the laughter stops, I’m even more grateful for the thoughtfulness and care that bind us all together.

 

 


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